Shadowed Love(Chapter 4)- The Answer

SHADOWED LOVE

Chapter 4- The Answer

“Sumit, well, I don’t love you. I respect you and your love for me and all the small good things you have done for me but I’m not into this love shit and all, you know that. I would suggest that lets stay as friends only.” Was the answer given by Shalini.

“Well I had presumed your answer would be somewhat like this so I had buried my expectations so that I couldn’t hurt myself. But yeah I am glad that you stood up and told me the truth because yesterday going back to home form your house I realised that you were never into love, it was just me who wanted to be around you and love you from inside but don’t worry I reckon it won’t destroy our friendship.” Sumit said with a warm smile on his face.

He continued “That’s the reason I had accepted my visit to Mumbai for my band’s audition. Now I can go to Mumbai without any doubt about the things between us. But please let’s just not tell it to anybody because I don’t know about other but Devika would surely pull your leg a lot. She is really jealous of you.”

“Well congratulations on your Mumbai visit and all the very best for your audition. And yeah it won’t harm our friendship even a little. And I know about Devika, she is slightly jealous but that’s because she wants to be the centre of attention for all the boys.” Shalini said.

“Thanks a lot” Sumit responded.

In the meantime Shaurya and Shivani came running with wide grins on their faces and shine in their eyes. Shaurya was the college toper and one of the member of her gang, while, Shivani was her friend who was sensible and witty and yeah her gang member.

“There you are you two.” Shaurya said while trying to control his breath.

“What happened? You two seem to be very happy and quite exhausted. Why are you in such a hurry? What happened?” asked Shalini.

“We wanted to share great news with every one of you. Shaurya yesterday proposed me and I… I said YES!!!” Shivani said with excitement.

“Isn’t it amazing? Finally we have a couple in our group. Yaay!” Shaurya said.

“Well congratulations to you both and I am really very happy for you both.” Shalini said with a comforting smile.

“Congrats buddy! And don’t forget my treat. It should be a huge one.” Sumit said.

“Thanks a lot both of you. And yeah bro, treat is for sure to everybody.” Shaurya said.

“Ok, I will be catching you guys later. Have to do some practice for the auditions.” Sumit said.

“So you finally accepted their request for audition? That’s great man. All the best and nail them.” Shaurya said.

“Thanks bro. Bye” Sumit said and left.

“Well Shaurya come let’s go, we have to tell it to everybody else also. The others.” Shivani said.

“Well Shivani you go. I have to talk to Shalini about something. I will be there in ten minutes my dear.” Shaurya said and leaned and gave a peck on her cheeks.

Shivani started to blush and nodded and went.

Shaurya and Shivani were perfect for each other as couple. Both were understanding, sensible and intelligent who helped everybody.

Watching their love blooming made Shalini realise that sometimes being strong is not the only thing you need in life, this time she wanted to be loved, to be cared, to be hugged by someone whom she could call just hers. Shalini started to have a double thought about her decision she made about Sumit. But it was soon interrupted by Shaurya.

“Shalini, I know about the blank calls you have been getting past two to three days.

And I know you won’t tell it to your grandparents or someone elder. But I thought that maybe you should try changing your number. Yesterday after I proposed Shivani, we were discussing about how to tell everybody and the discussion went about you after your name. Look you are our friend and I shouldn’t say this but may be according to me it could be Devika. Like she is so much jealous of you and you know she is the best friend of Anjali who can afford a private number. I am not blaming her but please try to confront her and do something for you.” Shaurya said with concern for his friend.

“Well Shaurya, Why would Devika do anything such like this to harm me? Even if she is jealous of me, she is my friend after all but your point makes sense. I will try to talk to her in an indirect manner.” Shalini said.

She thanked Shaurya and went to confront Devika if she was the one or if she knew anything about the calls. Both of them went to their respective ways.

“Devika, I wanted to talk to about something.” Shalini said.

To which Devika nodded and asked ”What is it Shalini?”

“Devika, well I just wanted to ask you that do you know anything about the blank caller?”

Shalini didn’t want to tell everybody that the caller said that they won’t come back till the time arises. She just wanted to finish this tension for once and for all. She wanted to uproot every minute possibility so she even accepted Shaurya suggestion and confronted but had she not done it, she must have had not find out about it.

Devika was now slightly out of her ease, because of Shalini’s question. She took a deep breath. In her mind she knew that one day she would have to tell Shalini about it. But she was bound between two friends. Devika was now confused to say the truth she knows or make a false commitment to save a friend but choosing any path would save one friend and hurt the other one. Many different thoughts were circling her mind like a hurricane and all of her cards were now stormed out. She was totally perplexed whether to say the truth or keep hiding it just like she had been doing it past three months.

The Dumb Loser

This story is of a boy called Aditya who fells into love with a girl called Ananya. A boy who is not so good looking, and is slightly fat falls for a very beautiful girl and here’s his story.

The sky changing from black to blue holding the tinge of orange before then shifting to yellow and finally turning into bluish white just filled my heart. I was up all night in thoughts of her and how she was, how she looked, and the smile she pursued. I was so sure inside me about the feelings I had been feeling, since the first day I had seen her. My eyes were filled with her conscience and I was dreaming only about her. It was like I was trapped inside her, inside her aroma which I could inhale being so distant apart from her right now. My mind was constantly thinking about her and I couldn’t figure out how much time had been gone inside her thoughts, it was just the dawn which made me realize that man! Its morning and you really have been crazily thinking about her and only her all the night. But what could I do, she was the best and only part of thoughts which I loved to nurture from time to time. She was a seed in my mind which I used to sow each morning I woke and now the seed had been producing jungles full of her thoughts and memories.

The morning had shown its face to time and I was about to go to get ready and see her in real rather than in my thoughts. But in my thoughts I could speak and I could share my moments with her and tell her how I felt.

I was wearing my white shirt and blue denims and I had worn my favourite deo to feel confident standing near her. People usually pray to god about how well or well their day should go but I prayed about seeing her once more and watch her dance in those moments like butterfly. I was there, at my destination and there she was with couple of her friends talking and laughing. She was wearing red top with black denims which totally fitted her body. She was looking as cute as ever, and I could just watch her from a distance and fall for her innocent smile and the glittering eyes. I was mesmerized to see you sparkle and sprinkle your colours all around you and making everybody happy.

Sometimes I used to wish that what could have happened if I had not been met with that accident. 

That day I was strolling in the corridors of our college and I was as usual lost in her thoughts. I could see her right there and she was laughing and having fun with her friends. Just because I couldn’t take my eyes off from her that shit happened. But I don’t curse her for that thing to happen. She didn’t know it was her fault, but actually it was not her fault either. I was so dumb and so numb, so crazy whenever she used to be around me and I just made fun of myself in front of her and still I know what I lost that day. If I had not fallen on stairs that day and later on, that fall took my voice from me. Well I was glad that atleast I could make her laugh and keep myself safe in one of her memories.

That day the fall made me mute forever and since then I had not been able to speak. Many doctors tried to fix up the problem but no result was found. But frankly speaking I don’t care if I can’t speak because my heart always yells her name out and my mind screams about her and tell my conscience that she is my all.

One day when I couldn’t stand it, I finally decided to tell her what I felt about her on the last day of our college. But I couldn’t speak so I wrote a letter.

Dear Ananya,

The first day I saw you I knew that one day I would be doing this thing. That day was the first day of our college and you had worn a green top with blue bottoms and you looked damn pretty like an angel had fallen on earth. Your eyes were shining. That day you had made a place inside my heart and as time passed by I was watching you closely and patiently to know you better, to understand you better. I had been finding reasons to be around you and to hear your voice because now that’s the only voice which I want to hear day and night. My voice is now buried down inside my heart but I wish that I could say all this to you in my voice with those emotions but these words might be enough to make that place in your heart. I know we had been friends, not best friends but good friends. I never wanted sympathy about my speech-impairment and you only stood and told everybody not to show sympathy rather make me strong and confident about who I am. You are so beautiful not because everyone tells you or your face is charming enough, but because of your heart which is too pure and serene. I always think about you and always have been and just wish to share my days with you till I last. I wish I could speak it that I love you but may be these words are now well written better said. I love you Ananya. I don’t know whether we will be meeting after this day but I just wish to be around you every time. Just a hope with wait for your reply.

Yours

Aditya

He waited around two weeks for Ananya to respond him and his anxiety was reaching his limits. But then he got a message from Ananya:

Aditya,

Sorry, but I think you should forget about me. You should stop dreaming about me because we are not meant to be together. I don’t want to humiliate you but please just look at yourself once. Like we don’t mix up together. You are a nice person though but not my type. I have always thought of you as a friend. I wish you find someone better than me who understand you and love you. But please it’s not me. I know you are a good person at heart and you have always helped me out but I am sorry it’s just not me.

Aditya was shattered to read the message. His doubt, his fear was right after all. He always feared about the same thing, that people won’t love him for his physical drawbacks and because of his muteness. All he did was to collect his pieces of heart and glue them with a fake smile and trying to move on, because he was sure now that people of the world don’t care about inner beauty, it’s all outside. He was not a loser. Losers are the people who can’t understand the real beauty which lies within us, inside our hearts and soul.

Its Always Been You

Well I presume I am taking too long to post new things. I am glad that most of you are liking the stuff and responding me through comments. I am very happy and delighted to see this, so I wanted to deliver you all a poem.

So here it goes,

Roaming with you all day along

Made a place in my heart so strong

Now it just sways towards you to find a place in yours

Cause my dear I don’t know whether if am able to pour

I want to shower with all I can and give you all I have

You are always on my mind and my heart is your new map

I have comprehend everything about you

I want to share this mere life with you

You and your cute little things

Everything about you is just too precious

I don’t know how it happened that I felt for you

I don’t know why this happened but with you I feel new

I just watched you flying high like a butterfly from a distance

And I was mesmerized by watching you under that beautiful shed

With yours wings of life and like an angel you have lighted up my heart

A shine which now resides inside me which I think cant be apart

Living with a hope to be yours someday

And trying a bit to charm you my lady

All I am summoning is the energy to confront you and go on my knees

To make you all mine and fulfill our true destiny

I am glad that you are loving me and reading my blog. After seeing the love for me I wanted to respond to your love and faith in by posting new things and maybe I think I should increase my frequency of my post on my novel ‘SHADOWED LOVE’. Well I will appreciate if you all leave me a comment about what should I do next for you? Should I make that one chapter per week novel into two chapters a week or should I start submitting more poems like this or some short stories?

Your views are respected and valued. Please submit your suggestions so that I can bring you more post to read and enjoy a little bit through an artistic way. J

Shadowed Love(Chapter 3)- The Confession

SHADOWED LOVE

Chapter 3- Confession

Shalini was now in confusion about what to say to Sumit. She was not prepared to face him. She herself didn’t know whether she loved him or it was just a mutual attraction because of all the blank phones calls, letter and the past memories. Shalini was totally messed up inside her mind. All she was thinking was of Sumit and what did she felt for him. She was searching in her mind to find an answer and slept with all the thoughts on standby.

Next morning she didn’t have the guts to face anybody from her gang especially Sumit. It was not about the guts she had to face him or not but she wanted to be sure enough to answer him properly about her feelings. She wanted to be prepared with every answer Sumit might be having.

After having her breakfast she decided that she will not go to college today and rather stay at home and think about the solution or what she really wanted in her life with Sumit as context. Firstly she wanted to know the reason of so much confusion. 

She never felt this before ever in her life that too so strong for someone. May be its illusion because of the circumstances or may be it is her emotions shouting at her, throwing words to nurture them into thoughts.

After thinking about an hour she felt exhausted and kind of bored, so, she thought a stroll in garden with morning fresh air and some music could help her.

It was 9 in the morning and the December mornings are quite cold so she took her jacket and her earphones after wearing her shoes and headed towards the park near her house.

She was feeling better now. No tension. No thoughts of some guy she thoughts she knew or anything or any change in her life. She felt revived from all the mess.

Just then a hand touched her shoulder, and she suddenly stopped and turned.

“Hey Miss Shalini Talwar!” said Daksh.

“Long time no see, where have you been these days?” Daksh asked.

“Oh it’s you Daksh! Well yeah long time. You know nah college and then work and hanging out with friends. Just don’t get that time now.” Said Shalini.

“I can understand Shalini, don’t worry.” He said giving a warm comforting smile.

Then he asked “so what brings you here today that too on a so cold morning?”

To which Shalini replied “actually I was tensed and confused about a decision so I thought going on a walk won’t do any harm”

“So what happened, you can share with me?” asked Daksh

Shalini then shared everything with Daksh. Daksh was her close friend at time of her school but after schooling, but after that college came up and their chats had been restricted to messages on phone. She shared the scene with the calls and the letter and her new gang she made in college. She shared how once Sumit had gone under so much trouble just to bring her lab file from her house to college in rainy weather. She shared and remembered how many small things Sumit have been trying to do for Shalini from the starting of their friendship. Just like, how he stood up for her campaigning as the youth new leader but she lost it. She remembered that whenever she felt low, he would sing her a song playing on his guitar, she remembered how he usually takes care of every relationship he makes and how firm he is about keeping them, she got remember his nature, his smile, and his strong will to make everybody happy. She told everything to Daksh.

Daksh asked Shalini “ST just tell me one thing!”

Shalini didn’t like the ‘ST’ tag because it was the initials of her name, may be it was because of she thought people will then call her scheduled tribe. She felt weird about ‘ST’ but still tried to maintain a smile for a friend who was helping her out and said 

“Yeah say Daksh.”

”Do you feel something for him?” he asked.

“I just don’t know Daksh.” She said.

“Well he seems to be a really nice guy for anybody and every girl out there but coming to a solution or a decision just like that while thinking would be waste of time and emotions if you don’t feel anything for him.” He suggested

“Umm... what do you think? Do I feel anything for him?” asked Shalini confusingly.

“Well I don’t know whether you feel about this guy or not but I know one thing that you are a smart girl so don’t rush things, just think lightly. You will figure out everything by the end of the day.” He said with a smile assuring enough to help her.

“Thanks a lot Daksh. That was a lot of help. It really means a lot to me.” Shalini said smiling.

“No issues Shalini. What are friends for in the end.” He said.

His phone ringed.

“Well I think I need to go. I will catch you later. It was nice to meet you. And don’t worry everything would turn out to be fine.” He said and left.

Shalini was now kind of sorted out in her mind. She went back to her house, and thought very calmly about everything. She made notes of everything, every little detail she knew.

At night finally Shalini was prepared for anything that comes up the next day. And she went to bed with a wide smile and happy heart to be coming up with the answer finally.

The next day she went to college and straight away she went to Sumit to confront him and respond to his letter.

“Hi Shalini. Why didn’t you come yesterday?” asked Sumit.

“Well actually I was busy with something so I couldn’t come.” Shalini responded.

Shalini continued.

“Umm… Sumit I saw your bouquet and your letter and I wanted to talk to you about that.” She said.

“Umm yeah Shalini please don’t take it in a wrong way.” He went nervous.

He continued.

“actually I wanted to say it directly but I heard you shouting at phone and thought it wasn’t the right time to come up to you at that time of night and saying all those things.” He said.

“What! What shouting?” Shalini asked.

“You seemed disturbed by the voice I could hear from outside. You said something about stalker and police.” He said.

A gulp went down Shalini’s throat. Her mind was raging with numerous thoughts now. But Sumit disturbed in between by asking “so what did you want me to tell or I should ask what your reply is?”

Shadowed Love- Chapter Two- The One

Shadowed Love

Chapter 2-The One

“Hello?!” asked Shalini

“Hmm…” a strange new voice, firm and seems to be of a man

“Who is this? Why the hell are you disturbing me day and night with all your calls?” Shalini angrily wanted to know.

“Shalini”

A short pause

“Shalini, I know you very well and believe me you also know me, almost like a friend, a good friend” the voice was now holding the breathes to keep the secret.

“Who the Hell are you? Just tell me right now or I am gonna tell it to police about the stalker I have who is eve teasing.” Shalini said.

“Hahaha… Shalini… You are still so naïve dear. I know you won’t do anything like this. So, don’t bother with all this, you can go and tell anybody you want.” said the voice.

“What is IT you want from me?” asked Shalini

“I want nothing from you Shalini. Well there is something for you rather. Just go to your front main door after this call, you will find everything.” The voice said.

“What’s happening?” Shalini asked surprisingly

“Nothing as such new for you. Just go, you will understand everything and from now on these calls also won’t be there until there is time for them. So hasta la vista Shalini. Take care.” Just after this the voice disappeared and the phone was hung down.

Shalini was confused about what was going on. She had so many situations about what might have been going on in her life. But, all she could think of was bad omens and evil things happened with her in the past.

Shalini was confused about going to the gate. She thought a while for it and finally made up her mind to step up and go for it.

She went to the door. Opened it. ‘CREEK’

The door was flung open.

She was trying to search for someone as a recognisable face and catch the caller thinking that he might be near only just to see her.

But after a good amount of time wasted on searching she dropped the idea and saw below down near to her feet.

She was shocked to see a bouquet full of red and pink roses and lilies and some orchids sprinkled everywhere near the bouquet. She picked it up. Took a deep breath and inhaled the aroma of fresh roses and lilies. She felt better than before but her mind was still searching for the answer when she saw a note inside the flowers.

Now all her conscience screamed at her that yes she was primarily thinking right about a new lover for her. But this time she didn’t know what was waiting for her in that letter or who was the one who wrote this.

She opened the note.

It read:

Dear Shalini,

I have always wanted to tell you all about this. But I knew that you are not into this stuff called love but yes roaming with you every time and making each other laugh, caring about others and thinking of all the good things sitting with our friends around. All this was just making a place in my mind first, then it went into my heart and now I couldn’t stand to finally tell you the truth about me and my feelings. I don’t know whether you have feelings for me or not but I know that the upper lines must have made the image of what I am about to say. Shalini I love you from the bottom most part of my heart and the deepest part tells me it’s true.

Shalini had a drop of tear in her right eye after reading the letter. She was still searching the signature or the name of the one who had send it her.

And then suddenly her phone again rang. ’TRING TRING TRING TRING’

She saw the name; it was again the private number.

She picked it up and before she could say anything she heard the voice saying just one word “SUMIT” and then the phone was hung again.

Now Shalini was in a great confusion and didn’t know what to do next.

Sumit was her one of her great friends and one of the member of her gang.

“Aarrggghhh SUMIT” Shalini screamed

And then she thought that maybe she also had been falling for him.

Shadowed Love- Chap 1

Shadowed Love- Part One

Chapter one- The Disturbance

“Hello? Anybody there? Helllooo??” Shalini furiously asking on her phone. But there is no reply.

“Why do you call if you don’t even want to utter a word?”

Still there is silence on the side of the phone. Fed up from these daily blank calls from a private number she threw her phone and then just went up to her bed to sleep. While lying on her bed she thought what’s going on in her life?

Taking a deep breath of confusion, she was searching her mind what is it that can disturb her daily just to call her and can’t have any guts to say. She said to herself that is someone in love with her because of her beauty or it’s just someone’s prank to make fun of her.

Just with her thoughts she went fall asleep and had a calm night without any line on her forehead.

Shalini, she was a very beautiful girl living in Delhi with her grandparents. She had a medium class family like most of the people. A college student studying in a reputed college. She had a good bunch of friends with whom she could hang out daily and they supported her with anything that came up. Shalini was a girl who had a charismatic and very attractive kind of personality, not because she was the prettiest girl in the college but it was that she was emotionally strong and was very intelligent too. Her helpful nature with her wit and her strong will to excel had always been making her different from all the other girls of her college. Everybody was kind of jealous of her as she was popular and boys were so after her. But her friends were the lucky one to have her in their life. All of them, Rohan, Shaurya, Anjali, Sumit, Rahul, Poonam, Shweta, Devika and Shivani were the so called gang of hers.

Shalini’s parents had died in a car accident when she was in her 11^th standard. Since then she had been making herself strong and determined to follow her dreams and bring a smile on the face of two souls which were in the afterlife area now. She believed in stars, constellations and her intuitions. She wanted nothing just to be so successful to make her inside intuitions happy which glowed for her parents.

The sun had come out with a new day and sunshine. Shalini was ready to go and then again her cell phone ranged. It was the private number from which she had a call yesternight. Her fresh mood from the night was again going bad. She was angry and wanted a solution for this disturbance in her life. It had been two whole week since she’s been having these calls. She went to her college and confronted her friends to find a solution. “Guys Help me nah, I don’t know who he is but he is been disturbing me since two weeks and now I am fed up.” She said.

“What Shalini every day you have a new lover behind you, please stop boasting about it daily :P” “it makes me jealous” teased Devika with tongue out.

“Stop making fun of her Devika” shouted Shweta.

“Umm why don’t you tell your grandparents about it?” suggested Rahul.

“I can’t because they will be tensed which I can’t let happen.” Responded Shalini.

“Yeah you have a point, they must be having a rough time without your parents but you can call police, you live in Delhi” said Shaurya.

“NO I won’t do that either, I’m a strong girl, if you guys won’t help then I will find the solution myself.” She just became angry and went from there.

Her friends were concerned about her so they discussed about it and tried to bring a solution which can help their friend with her problem. But, sadly, nothing helped as nothing came up their mind rather confronting or consulting an older being.

Shalini was lying on her bed with her laptop and was waiting for the phone to ring as now she had the solution built in her mind to counter the disturbance which had been causing chaos to her mind since two weeks.

And suddenly then the phone rang. TRING! TRING! TRING! TRING!

She picked it up and said “Hello?”.