The Dumb Loser

This story is of a boy called Aditya who fells into love with a girl called Ananya. A boy who is not so good looking, and is slightly fat falls for a very beautiful girl and here’s his story.

The sky changing from black to blue holding the tinge of orange before then shifting to yellow and finally turning into bluish white just filled my heart. I was up all night in thoughts of her and how she was, how she looked, and the smile she pursued. I was so sure inside me about the feelings I had been feeling, since the first day I had seen her. My eyes were filled with her conscience and I was dreaming only about her. It was like I was trapped inside her, inside her aroma which I could inhale being so distant apart from her right now. My mind was constantly thinking about her and I couldn’t figure out how much time had been gone inside her thoughts, it was just the dawn which made me realize that man! Its morning and you really have been crazily thinking about her and only her all the night. But what could I do, she was the best and only part of thoughts which I loved to nurture from time to time. She was a seed in my mind which I used to sow each morning I woke and now the seed had been producing jungles full of her thoughts and memories.

The morning had shown its face to time and I was about to go to get ready and see her in real rather than in my thoughts. But in my thoughts I could speak and I could share my moments with her and tell her how I felt.

I was wearing my white shirt and blue denims and I had worn my favourite deo to feel confident standing near her. People usually pray to god about how well or well their day should go but I prayed about seeing her once more and watch her dance in those moments like butterfly. I was there, at my destination and there she was with couple of her friends talking and laughing. She was wearing red top with black denims which totally fitted her body. She was looking as cute as ever, and I could just watch her from a distance and fall for her innocent smile and the glittering eyes. I was mesmerized to see you sparkle and sprinkle your colours all around you and making everybody happy.

Sometimes I used to wish that what could have happened if I had not been met with that accident. 

That day I was strolling in the corridors of our college and I was as usual lost in her thoughts. I could see her right there and she was laughing and having fun with her friends. Just because I couldn’t take my eyes off from her that shit happened. But I don’t curse her for that thing to happen. She didn’t know it was her fault, but actually it was not her fault either. I was so dumb and so numb, so crazy whenever she used to be around me and I just made fun of myself in front of her and still I know what I lost that day. If I had not fallen on stairs that day and later on, that fall took my voice from me. Well I was glad that atleast I could make her laugh and keep myself safe in one of her memories.

That day the fall made me mute forever and since then I had not been able to speak. Many doctors tried to fix up the problem but no result was found. But frankly speaking I don’t care if I can’t speak because my heart always yells her name out and my mind screams about her and tell my conscience that she is my all.

One day when I couldn’t stand it, I finally decided to tell her what I felt about her on the last day of our college. But I couldn’t speak so I wrote a letter.

Dear Ananya,

The first day I saw you I knew that one day I would be doing this thing. That day was the first day of our college and you had worn a green top with blue bottoms and you looked damn pretty like an angel had fallen on earth. Your eyes were shining. That day you had made a place inside my heart and as time passed by I was watching you closely and patiently to know you better, to understand you better. I had been finding reasons to be around you and to hear your voice because now that’s the only voice which I want to hear day and night. My voice is now buried down inside my heart but I wish that I could say all this to you in my voice with those emotions but these words might be enough to make that place in your heart. I know we had been friends, not best friends but good friends. I never wanted sympathy about my speech-impairment and you only stood and told everybody not to show sympathy rather make me strong and confident about who I am. You are so beautiful not because everyone tells you or your face is charming enough, but because of your heart which is too pure and serene. I always think about you and always have been and just wish to share my days with you till I last. I wish I could speak it that I love you but may be these words are now well written better said. I love you Ananya. I don’t know whether we will be meeting after this day but I just wish to be around you every time. Just a hope with wait for your reply.

Yours

Aditya

He waited around two weeks for Ananya to respond him and his anxiety was reaching his limits. But then he got a message from Ananya:

Aditya,

Sorry, but I think you should forget about me. You should stop dreaming about me because we are not meant to be together. I don’t want to humiliate you but please just look at yourself once. Like we don’t mix up together. You are a nice person though but not my type. I have always thought of you as a friend. I wish you find someone better than me who understand you and love you. But please it’s not me. I know you are a good person at heart and you have always helped me out but I am sorry it’s just not me.

Aditya was shattered to read the message. His doubt, his fear was right after all. He always feared about the same thing, that people won’t love him for his physical drawbacks and because of his muteness. All he did was to collect his pieces of heart and glue them with a fake smile and trying to move on, because he was sure now that people of the world don’t care about inner beauty, it’s all outside. He was not a loser. Losers are the people who can’t understand the real beauty which lies within us, inside our hearts and soul.